I Am...

Beyond Measure. I am
"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within is..." - Ephesians 3:20

Loved Unconditionally. For this, I am
"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." - Romans 8:38

Eternally Grateful. I have been
"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." - Colossians 3:16,17

Saved by Grace. I will
"But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved." - Ephesians 2:4,5

Sing Songs of Praise. Because
"Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me." - Psalm 63:7,8

Even in my Sinful Nature, my God
"When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your sinful nature, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross." - Colossians 2:13,14

Delivered Me.
"For great is your love toward me; you have delivered me from the depths of the grave." - Psalm 86:13



Writing poetry is not necessarily my cup of tea, but I figured I would give it a go, if for the sake of time, if nothing else.

In the field of social work, in dealing with people, we talk often of feelings: How are you feeling? What are you feeling? How did this or that particular event make you feel?, etc...

I truly feel blessed. There is no word that describes it better. I know that I am forgiven; I know that I am loved. Even if all the other blessings and happy things in my life were stripped away, I would know that I am blessed because of the forgiveness, redemption, and life changing love that has been bestowed upon me through Jesus Christ, my Savior.

I wake up every day knowing that I serve a God who will never leave me nor forsake me (Deuteronomy 31:8). And He has blessed me with more than I could ever have hoped for. He has surrounded me with people who need to be loved; all of those people are blessings. He has given me people who love me; all of those people are blessings. He has given me passions, desires, and goals; all of those things are blessings. He has changed my life and my heart in radical ways... And He is still changing me.

He is patient; slow to anger and abounding in love (Psalm 103:8).

There are days when I do not necessarily feel blessed, but even on those days, I know that I am blessed. On the days that I feel defeated, on the days I feel overwhelmed, and on the days when I am bored out of my mind (like today), I know one thing: I am blessed.

Happy Birthday!

Today is the birthday of one of the greatest men I have ever known: My dad.



I can think of no other person for whom I have greater respect than my father. I cannot think of a more godly man. He is the hardest worker I have ever beheld, and he has a gentler spirit than anyone else I know. He has lived his life in humility and in service to others; never putting himself first.

My dad has always been in my corner. My dad has stood for me when I have not had it in me to stand alone. He has defended me in the face of opposition. He has prayed and fasted for me when my prayers seemed to have fallen short. He has believed in me and in my dreams when no one else did. He has believed in my dreams even when I myself did not believe in them. He has supported every endeavor I have ever undertaken. He has encouraged me toward every goal I have ever expressed. He has confronted me for mistakes I have made, but has never shamed me for them.

In my life, my dad has been a wonderful demonstration of the grace of Christ. He has forgiven me when I have not deserved it. He has loved me when I have been unlovable. He has disciplined me when I have been in the wrong.

There is no one I know who has lived a more successful life than my father. Without him, I cannot imagine what my life up to this point would have been like.

No matter how old and frail he grows, he will still be able to beat the crap out of anyone who does not treat me well. No matter how much his memory may begin to fail one day, he will still be the smartest man I know. And no matter how wrinkly he becomes, he will still be one of the most handsome guys I know.

My dad has shown me the heart of Christ. My dad has shown me how to make mistakes. My dad has taught me to be teachable and to learn from those mistakes; to heed instruction from those who are wiser than I am. My dad has taught me that there is redemption from our mistakes, because we serve a God of second chances. My dad has taught me how to struggle well; and thus, how to live victoriously.

I could not be more proud of or more thankful for my dad. I could not love him more.

Happy Birthday, Daddy!

A Little Bit of Prettiness

This bedroom dresser, from here, is totally unrealistic (for me, anyway), but so pretty!



I love the KitchenAid stand mixer! Why it is under the chair, I am not sure... Picture from here...



This happy Ferris wheel is from one of my current favorite blogs.


I just cannot keep from smiling when I look at this picture, from here!



From here. This picture just screams, "Please rain today so I can stay home in my pjs and read by my window!"

Easter Cupcakes

I know it is not technically Easter yet, but this weekend was pretty wide open for me. Andrew was out of town Saturday, I didn't have any big assignments to complete for work or for school... So I had some free time to do whatever the heck I wanted!
My mom and I shopped Saturday morning, and I bought a pair of pretty black heels to wear to Andrew's military ball. Afterward, I had a bit of a sweet tooth that I cured with these adorable cupcakes!

I used this recipe for the vanilla cake, and this one for the vanilla buttercream frosting, but instead of using 1/4 teaspoon of vanilla extract, I used 1/4 teaspoon of almond extract and 1/4 teaspoon of butter flavoring... The sweeter the better in my opinion!

For the grass, I used flaked coconut mixed with a little green food coloring.

Of course, the bunnies are Peeps marshmallows!

These were really easy, and absolutely delicious! No one in my family likes Peeps, so most people threw them away. But they were still cute to use as decorations. Next time, I may use jelly beans, or chocolate bunnies instead!

Next time may not be until next Easter though, because we have quite the weekend planned next week! Andrew's family is coming into town Thursday, and they are staying until Sunday morning. My grandmother is also coming that same weekend. Plus, my mom planned an Easter egg hunt for the kids at church, so that will occupy most of next Saturday! Not among the least of these things, my dad's birthday is also next weekend! :)

So happy Palm Sunday.

No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn.- Hal Borland

There are an abundance of reasons I cannot wait until Springtime:

1) I can say goodbye to my winter coats until next year (FINALLY)!
2) With Spring comes... EASTER! :)
3) I can wear flip-flops, thus showing off the ridiculously expensive new nail polish I have recently acquired (that I would never buy if it were not for a sister who is in cosmetology school).
4) I am graduating from college (and this event is accompanied by a host of emotions other than just excitement... Maybe I will get into those details some other time)!
5) I am going to WASHINGTON, DC!

This list could go on, but I will stop here and highlight Reason #5, which will be occurring in 43 days. The following list was compiled based upon the best interest of all members of the traveling party. We all realize that there is much more to see in our nation's great capital; however, we will be pinched for time, and three of the four of us have been to D.C. in the past. In light of this, we were able to opt out of doing and seeing a few of the things that we have done and seen previously. Here are the must sees of the trip:

• Lincoln Memorial
• World War II Memorial
  
• Vietnam Veterans Memorial Wall
  
• Arlington National Cemetery
  
• Korean War Veterans Memorial
  
• Jefferson Memorial
• Franklin Delano Roosevelt Memorial

(and all other memorials in the surrounding area)

• Washington Monument
• Holocaust Museum
• National Archives Building
• National Museum of American History
• American Art Museum
• Ford Theatre
• Lincoln Theatre

(other Smithsonians are optional dependent upon time)

• Williamsburg (which will require a full day)
  
• Mount Vernon, home of George Washington

In honor of this upcoming adventure, here are some precious pictures:

Steal My Heart

I so look forward to the day that I can become a pet owner. And these Italian Greyhounds have absolutely won me over.
If you click here, you can read all about the wonderful personalities these dogs possess.

from here

from here

from here

from here

from here

from here

from here

from here

from here

That is all for now. My laziness has gotten the best of me today! :)

Watchfulness

"Be dressed and ready for service and keep your lamps burning, like men waiting for their master to return from a wedding banquet, so that when he comes and knocks they can immediately open the door for him. It will be good for those servants whose master finds them watching when he comes. I tell you the truth, he will dress himself to serve, will have them recline at the table and will come and wait on them. It will be good for those servants whose master finds them ready, even if he comes in the second or third watch of the night. But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what hour the thief was coming, he would not have let his house be broken into. You also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him."
- Luke 12:35-40

In 2003, the summer I turned fourteen, I attended a ten day teen conference: Nazarene Youth Conference. The conference, in Houston, Texas, was a gathering of teenagers from across the United States, all of whom were affiliated with the Nazarene church. The format has changed a lot since the year I went, but this particular year, we had an opening ceremony, and then each day following, we had big services each morning and evening; during the day we had options of various seminars and small groups to attend; one day we participated in a community service project; one day we went to Six Flags (but it was miserably hot and humid... particularly for someone who was used to dry, desert heat); each night, there were concerts available for us to attend if we chose to do so.

With so much activity crammed into such a short amount of time, I have forgotten most of what occurred during the week. I do not remember the names of most of the speakers. I have forgotten the names of most of the artists who performed, and I cannot remember the topics of many of the seminars I attended. I can vividly remember only one service from that week. It was the first service of the entire conference, and she was the very first speaker of the week. This woman was not even the main speaker; she spoke only briefly before introducing the main speaker of the evening. But what she said spoke profoundly to my fourteen-year-old heart, and it changed the way that I would live my life from that point on.

The speaker (I wish I remembered her name) related the passage above to infatuation. When someone is in the beginning stages of a dating relationship, she is totally smitten with her new significant other: She dresses for him, wearing clothes that she knows he will like. She takes extra time on her hair. If she thinks there is even the smallest possibility of him showing up at her front door, she takes extra time scrubbing the entire house from top to bottom, until there is not even one streak on a window or a crumb on the floor. After she has thoroughly cleaned the house, she will prepare herself again for the time when she may see her lover. When all the preparations have been made, she will sit by the door, or gaze out the window, until she sees him coming up the drive. She has prepared herself, her home, and her heart for the one whom she desires.

As any fourteen- year-old girl may, I thought I grasped this concept clearly. I had the BIGGEST crush on a boy at school. I dressed for him, prepared for him, did for him things that were completely irrational in the eyes of others. I knew people thought I was being silly, or even foolish, but that did not stop me from doing what I was doing. And what I was doing, basically, was living for the one whom I thought I loved.

I still agree with that: when we are in love with a person, it changes the way we live. But when we truly love someone; when we make the choice to really love them, with no strings attached, it changes the way we live on a completely different level. The change becomes more real, more sacrificial, more lasting.

Thus, seven years later, this passage has new meaning, and added significance, to me. I am older now, and I have someone in my life whom I truly and deeply love, with a love that goes far beyond infatuation. Beginning to understand what it is like to live life loving another person, and beginning to understand what it is like to live life knowing that I have the love of that other person in return, has opened my heart to another aspect of this passage of Scripture that I did not have the maturity to recognize years ago.

When we love someone, we open our whole selves to them.

We do prepare for them: I love to look pretty for Andrew. I love to cook for him; I love to clean for him; and I love to do things for him.

Amidst all of our preparation; however, we do not attempt to cover up who we really are. When we are secure in the love of another, we allow them to see our flaws; we discuss our shortcomings with them; we let them in to the dusty, dingy, dark places of our hearts; we allow them to come in and change us; we allow them to help us grow, and to grow along with us.

Yes, we should prepare our hearts and minds for service to Christ (verse 35), but this does not mean that we should be fearful of what Christ will do if our lives are imperfect. Being imperfect is not a reason not to open the door the Christ when He does arrive. Contrarily, it is the reason TO open the door for Him. His entrance through it can bring redemption to a broken life (Ephesians 1:7- "In Him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace").

Christ wants to see every part of us; Christ does see every part of us. A significant part of being watchful and ready is simply opening our hearts to Christ: being vulnerable, being mold-able, and being shape-able. Christ does not expect us to be perfect; he expects us to love Him. He does not expect spotlessness; if this were possible, His death would not have been necessary. Christ asks that we recognize our shortcomings and our need for His presence and change in our lives. These are the things that make us ready for service to Him.

Too Cute!

Honestly, in the spirit of Easter, I am going to have to get to baking! These cookies are so precious; and so easy (which is key for me). Plus, they incorporate icing (which I cannot get enough), along with jelly beans (LOVE), and coconut (also LOVE): Three things that I simply cannot get enough of.
I think that, to balance out the healthy veggies I plan to cook this weekend, I am going to have to bake these cookies. They are way too cute to pass up! As far as the actual baking aspect goes, some might say these cookies are "cheating"; I just call it a happy little shortcut :)

The picture came from Epicute, which is one of the cutest blogs around (to my limited knowledge), and the recipe came from here.

INGREDIENTS

1 package (16 oz) Pillsbury® Ready To Bake!® sugar cookies
1 container (12 oz) fluffy white frosting
1 cup flaked coconut
Food color
Jelly beans

DIRECTIONS

1. Heat oven to 350° F. Bake cookies as directed on package. Cool completely.

2.Frost cookies. Add coconut to a 1-quart resealable food-storage plastic bag. Add 2 to 3 drops favorite food color, shaking bag to blend color. It may be necessary to add 1 to 2 teaspoons water to help disperse the color evenly or additional food color until desired color is reached. Sprinkle about 1 teaspoon coconut on each cookie.

3.Top with jelly beans or candy coated chocolate peanut candy.

While we are at it, here are some more adorable Easter inspirations from Epicute!

Going Green

I must admit, I have yet to jump on the "go green" bandwagon. I do not litter. I do recycle when it is convenient. If I have a diet coke can to get rid of, and just happen to pass a bin with the words "aluminum only" on it, then I utilize it. If I could walk everywhere I went (versus driving) then I would... at least in warm, sunny weather... but that is because I love walking, not because I want to save the earth. I do try to recycle paper faithfully since I seem to use so much of it these days. I adore animals, and can appreciate nice looking plants and green grass. That is about the extent of my earth friendliness.

So... by "going green" I am actually referring to the dinner menu. I stumbled across these recipes this week, and they look DELISH. I cannot wait to try them both!

Honey and Jam opened my eyes (and taste buds) up to a whole new world of possibilities with this recipe:

Oven Roasted Broccoli

This is her picture. When I do finally get around to making this, I will post a picture of my own; however, please do not expect it to do her's justice!

1 1/4 pounds broccoli crowns, cut into florets (about 8 cups)
3 1/2 tablespoons olive oil, divided
2 garlic cloves, minced
Large pinch of dried crushed red pepper

Preheat oven to 450°F. Toss broccoli and 3 tablespoons oil in large bowl to coat. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Transfer to rimmed baking sheet. Roast 15 minutes. Stir remaining 1/2 tablespoon oil, garlic, and red pepper in small bowl. Drizzle garlic mixture over broccoli; toss to coat. Roast until broccoli is beginning to brown, about 8 minutes longer. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Serve immediately.

Just in case that is not quite enough "green" for you, here is another recipe that looks equally as tasty, and just as easy to make! I came upon this on allrecipes.com, which is a great last-minute-go-to site!

Asparagus Side Dish

1 bunch fresh asparagus, trimmed
2/3 cup water
1/4 cup olive oil
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
10 grape tomatoes, halved

Combine the asparagus and water in a 10 inch skillet and place over medium heat; cover. Allow the asparagus to steam until tender, about 10 minutes; drain. Reduce heat to low and return the skillet to the heat. Drizzle olive oil over the asparagus; sprinkle with Parmesan cheese. Add the grape tomatoes to the skillet and replace the lid. Allow to sit covered until the cheese melts and the tomatoes are slightly steamed, about 2 minutes.

YUMMM! I will definitely be going green this weekend!

One of Those Days

Everything went wrong today. No. That is not totally true. My day actually got off to a great start. So let me rephrase that:

Something happened today that made me feel like I am terrible at my job; like I am horribly inadequate, and like I let someone down tremendously. Do you ever have those days?

I had a home visit with a client just a week ago. She seemed okay: talked a little about struggling financially, mentioned a hearing with Section 8 in regards to her monthly rent, and vented some about her issues with the landlord (whom she basically hates). I noticed a few red flags, and asked her what resources she had tried in order to get some financial help. Other than that, I did not offer much help or advice. I knew that our program could not help her financially, because we are only able to help clients monetarily one time each year. We helped her with a water bill in November.

I got a phone call today from this same client saying that she received a 24- hour cut- off notice today from the water company. She said she tried every community resource that she could think of. I named other places to her; she had already tried those too. She even tried churches near her neighborhood. Most had the funds, but were unwilling to help (that is a different story altogether... Don't even get me started).

How did I miss this last week? Why did I not see it coming? Why did we not discuss her immediate financial needs in greater detail? I could tell that she wanted to, and I purposefully avoided it, knowing that I would not be able to help her as immediately and directly as she would have liked. I should have stayed with her and watched her make phone calls to any and all organizations that offer, or would even for a brief moment consider offering, emergency financial assistance. I should have discussed any and all options with her. I should have encouraged some kind of positive change in her. Instead, I side-stepped around the issue as much has I possibly could.

To top it all off, all this lady needs to keep her water on for a few more weeks is to make a deposit of $75 to the water company. That's it! That $75 will only keep her water on through the end of the month, and then she has to make the rest of the payment. $75. I could write a check to her for $75 and not miss that money for a second (Technically, I could not do that, because that would be seriously crossing some boundaries...) That breaks my heart.

It breaks my heart to see someone be given chance after chance after chance, and to blow it every time by making poor decisions. Not knowing the best way to help them long-term breaks my heart even more. Not knowing how to equip her to be able to help herself is so frustrating. Paying her $75 deposit, or even paying her entire water bill (which is what we ended up doing), is only going to help her immediate need; it is not going to teach her how to prevent the same thing from happening again next month, and the next, and the next. I almost feel that "helping" her by paying her water bill is not helping her at all; only enabling her to continue in her poor money management and poor choices.

So how do I feel today? Defeated, overwhelmed, slightly angry at myself.

Icing on the cake: Last night I finished about a ten page long assignment. Tonight, I went to my computer to print this assignment and realized that only the first half of it is saved onto my computer; apparently, I forgot to save the second half of my work. This paper is due first thing tomorrow morning.

Here is the cherry on top: This paper is actually a process recording. I taped an interview with a client, and typed out, verbatim, the entire interview. Every cough, every laugh, every paper shuffle, every pause, etc. After I typed this, for the sake of confidentiality, I erased the interview from my voice recorder; therefore, I have no way of knowing exactly what was said during the second half of the interview.

What a great night.

After all of that griping, here is a truly wonderful thing that happened today (it at least has the potential of being a wonderful thing): I had a job interview with an agency that I completed a practicum with about a year ago. I loved my experience there, and when I saw that they were hiring, I jumped on it. The position is only part time, but that would be perfect if I decide to go to graduate school in the Fall. The hours would work perfectly, I would be working with lovely people, and I would be doing what I love to do. The girl who interviewed me also said that the agency is really good about working with students. If I get the job, I will have the option of also doing my field placement there for grad school. I could intern in a different department than the one I work in, and the part-time position would work around my intern position. The job title is "In-Home Specialist." I would be spending time with elderly clients, taking them grocery shopping, going grocery shopping for them, cooking, cleaning, etc. It sounds like something I would really enjoy, and it would be great job experience! Plus, I love that agency, all that they stand for, and the attitudes of their employees.

I now feel slightly convicted for spending this entire post venting about my bad day. It was really not that bad at all! I had a great morning, and a great afternoon too! Plus, the weather was ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS today. I am so blessed... beyond what I deserve, and beyond what I could ever earn.

"Praise be to God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer." - 2 Corinthians 1:3-6

Here are some things that made me happy...

There is more where that came from here.


Just hop on over here for more cute dog photos.

Psalm 34

"I will extol the LORD at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.

My soul will boast in the LORD;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.

Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.

I sought the LORD, and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears.

Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.

This poor man called, and the LORD heard him;
he saved him out of all his troubles.

The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.

Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.

Fear the LORD, you his saints,
for those who fear him lack nothing.

The lions may grow weak and hungry,
but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.

Come, my children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the LORD.

Whoever of you loves life
and desires to see many good days,

keep your tongue from evil
and your lips from speaking lies.

Turn from evil and do good;
seek peace and pursue it.

The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their cry;

the face of the LORD is against those who do evil,
to cut off the memory of them from the earth.

The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;

he protects all his bones,
not one of them will be broken.

Evil will slay the wicked;
the foes of the righteous will be condemned.

The LORD redeems his servants;
no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him."

-Psalm 34

An End to the Weekend

"Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus' feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume."
John 12:3

I have really struggled this past week. I am one of those people who, no matter where she is in life, is always looking toward, and preparing for, the "next" thing... Whatever that may be. I enjoy being able to plan for that next thing. I enjoy the excitement of beginning that next thing; and when I finally get to that next thing, I enjoy it until it is time to start preparing for the next, next thing.

I feel like, over the course of the past week, everything sort of came to a head. I finished assignments for class that symbolize the nearing of an end to the "college chapter" of my life. I realized I have just one month left as an intern. I realized that the next thing is just around the corner, and that I have no clue what that next thing is; I have no clue what to expect. I can plan as much as I want to. I can prepare something to death and still not know where I am headed or what will come of my preparedness. And no matter how much I may prepare, I find myself feeling no more certain of anything than I was before.

Graduation; finding a job; starting graduate school; getting married; whatever the next chapter of my life may hold; the prospect of all of those things brings excitement, happy nervousness, even giddiness. I feel ready for all of those things, but even so, along with that excitement and readiness comes fear of the unknown, anxiousness, a strong desire to control each and every unknown in my life, and an aggravation at not being able to do that.

Mary took a pint of perfume and poured it at Jesus' feet. She did not pour just a few drops of the perfume. She did not pour out half the perfume and save the rest for some other purpose. Mary's pouring of the perfume onto Jesus' feet was her act of worship to Him; it was her act of giving. In our worship, in true worship, we must give our everything; no matter how costly it may seem. Worship is an act of sacrifice. I cannot come to Christ holding tightly to things that I treasure (Matthew 6: 19-24). In an act of worship, I must pour out these things. Just as Mary poured out her perfume. I must pour out my will. I must pour out my controlling, selfish spirit. I must pour out my pride. I must pour out my fear. Everything I treasure that is preventing me from serving and worshiping my Master with every part of me should be poured out upon His feet; it must be released to Him so that I have room only for Him.


"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great that darkness!
No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one an despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money."

- Matthew 6: 19-24

Happy Almost Friday!

When I was younger, and our extended family on my mom's side would get together, my cousins and I would spend hours playing outside. My grandmother had a big blue shed in her backyard, and behind that shed was a plot of dirt. "Us kids" loved to dig in that dirt! And for whatever reason, we never dug with our hands; we used metal spoons from Granny's kitchen. While some of us were competing to see who could dig the deepest, or the biggest whole, or who could dig the fastest, my main goal usually seemed to be to be able to dig alongside everyone else without getting a single speck of dirt on my hands or my clothes. I would dig as slowly and meticulously as necessary in order to avoid getting messy. I would not even sit down while I dug; I hovered over the ground in kind of a squatting position. I wanted to be included in what was going on around me, but I did not particularly want to be very involved. I wanted to be near the mess and the dirt without actually being in it.

As we grew older, my sister began helping my grandmother in the kitchen. I would cringe at the prospect of helping in the kitchen. I hated getting my hands sticky; I hated smelling funny. I would not touch uncooked chicken breast because of its yucky smell and slimy texture. I would help in a distant, far-removed manner: stirring, rinsing, setting the oven timer, but never touching the mess. I gave the appearance of helping, but compared to what I could have been doing, I really was not helping much at all. I made my services in the kitchen available, but with lots of contingencies attached.

I am sure you know where I am going with this by now...

Thank God that He is not this way! We serve a God who is not afraid to reach into the broken places of our lives and transform them. The messiness of our hearts does not stop Him from loving us. The God of the universe humbled Himself to the point of death: the death of the lowest of criminals. He was not too proud to get involved in the disgusting, repulsive parts of our lives. And where I would be today without His grace, I do not know.

"Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death- even death on a cross!"
- Philippians 2:6-8

"God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God."
- 2 Corinthians 5:21

He has transformed my heart. He is continuing to transform my heart. Because of His redemption in my life, I no longer hold the messiness of others at bay. I want to become involved in the broken pieces of other people's lives so that I can share with them the hope that I have. Whereas I was once repulsed by unclean things, I am now drawn toward those things and those people that may be, by the world's standards, unlovable. I live for days that I am able to reach into someone's life and help them produce change.

In the field of social work, I am rarely able to express my faith verbally, but that does not mean I am unable to express it directly. My actions may be the only picture of Christ that certain individuals and families ever experience (2 Corinthians 3:3). I serve a God who associated with the lowly and the dirty. I serve a God who is not afraid to get His hands messy. As I was reminded of Sunday, I serve a God who helps those who cannot help themselves. And none of us can. If we could help ourselves, Christ would have come and died for naught. How dare I even begin to think that I can help myself? How dare I try to maintain control of my own life when the King of the world has asked that I relinquish that control to Him?

"But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions- it is by grace you have been saved... For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith- and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God- not by works, so that no one can boast."
- Ephesians 2:4,5,8

Thank God for redeeming me. He summoned me from complacency to a life of compassion. Thank God that He was not too mighty or too powerful to consider Himself lower than the lowest of sinners. Thank God for healing the places of my heart that no one else knew needed healing. Thank God that every broken place in my life is an opportunity for grace and for transformation.

Psalm 71:23- "My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to you- I, whom you have redeemed."

You're Never Fully Dressed Without a Smile- Martin Charnin

You can smile.
When you can't say a word, you can smile,
Though you may not be heard.
You can smile, whether sunny or fair.
You can smile anytime, anywhere.

My mom taught my sister and me that song when we were little girls. And these people prove that it is true, you can smile anytime, anywhere. If they can muster up smiles, then so can I!

from here

"The biggest sin we commit is underestimating how much pain is hidden behind the smiles of the people we'll meet today." (My mom gave me this quote, too!)

from here

from here... and this whole blog is amazing, actually!


"We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do. " - Mother Teresa

Spring Break!

This will be the last you will hear from me until this time next week! Andrew and I are going to Panama City, Florida for Spring break. We are going with three other couples, and staying in a condo by the beach. We are leaving early this morning, and we will return next Saturday. I cannot wait to be able to step outside without feeling so cold that I think my toes are gonna freeze off!

According to the ten day forecast, we may be in for a little rain, but that is okay with me! I would pick rain over cold any day of the week, and any time of the year! Plus, it will give me a chance to wear the new rain jacket that my mom bought me from Forever 21!

Just for sentimental purposes, here is a flashback to Spring Break last year:

I leave you with this lovely thought for the week....

"The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."- Zephaniah 3:17

Friday is Here!

About two years ago, I attended a Mercy Ministries conference here in Nashville. Mercy Ministries is a biblically based program that serves girls, ages 13-28, who are in the clutches of substance abuse, depression, eating disorders, unplanned pregnancies, physical and sexual abuse, and self-harm.

There were literally thousands of people, of all genders, ages, and races, at this conference. In the stadium where we were, there was a section of about 100 girls directly across the room from my seat. In the huge stadium, each girl was literally just a little speck of a person; that is how far away they were from where I was sitting. Had one of the speakers not announced who the girls were, I probably would not have even noticed them. The girls were all girls who were currently in the Program. They were all girls who were in the midst of some kind of bondage: the bondage of an eating disorder, self-harm, depression, substance abuse; girls who had lived through years of sexual or physical abuse; girls who had battled things that I could not even imagine experiencing, and certainly could not imagine living through.

At one point during the evening, Natalie Grant came out on stage and sang this song:



When she got to the chorus, I looked across the stadium from me, and I saw 100 girls stand up out of their seats. I saw 200 hands reach up toward the sky. I heard shouts of praise to a God who delivers from addiction; who heals any hurt; and whose love can cover any sin. I saw girls who believed in a God who is greater than rape; who is greater than physical pain; who is greater than self-mutilation; who is greater than starvation. I heard cries of hallelujahs; tears of thanksgiving. At one point, some of the girls even started jumping up and down. They were literally screaming thanks and praise and glory to the Most High. I do not remember another time when I have been so incredibly moved. Words cannot describe how strongly I felt the power of the Holy Spirit in that place. These girls had been through circumstances that I could not fathom in my wildest dreams. They were dealing with issues that I would probably succumb to; but they were fighting them. On the surface, many may have had no reason to praise God. Someone else may have seen them and thought they were crazy. I was brought to my knees by the presence of the Holy Spirit and by the power of God that I saw displayed in these girls. They believed it, and it was why they were still alive to be at that conference that day.

I serve a God more powerful than any drug, and stronger than any addiction. I serve a God bigger than any sin, and greater than any circumstance. I serve a God who is jealous for me; who says that NOTHING can separate me from His love. "Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:38,39)."

I serve a God who reached into the mud and mire of my life, into my bad choices, into my sin, and into my selfishness. He pulled me out, and gave me a firm place to stand. He replaced my cries of agony, despair, and loneliness, with songs of praise to Him (Psalm 40, paraphrase). That is what my God did for me. And for today, that is my testimony.

My God is a lover. He is a healer and a deliver. My God is a fighter. My God is a helper. And my God is a Savior.

For you, Erin :)

I don't get to see most of my cousins very often. Actually, I do not get to see any of them often! Every now and then, we will hear from each other, thanks to all this modern technology we have nowadays.

The only people I actually expect to ever read my blog are my immediate family members, and that is pretty much why I decided to start blogging in the first place. Sometimes we get so busy that sharing our daily thoughts, even with our closest family members, gets put on the back burner. Plus, it is a really nice way to organize all the things I like! Anyway, with that being said, I was thrilled when Erin (a cousin) told me that she read my blog! I felt so honored!

Today, I found this blog, and this particular photo reminded me of Erin! She is a nurse... or is going to be... and she is simply a beautiful person! So Erin, I hope you see this post today, because I am writing it especially with you in mind!


Rosie also has an online store.
And if you just want to look at her pics, this is the place to go.

Happy Birthday!

Today is Dr. Seuss' birthday,
And as a way to celebrate
I am going to try to write in rhyme,
So it might be a short post this time.

I wanted to bake Dr. Seuss a cake,
But the week was so busy there was no time to bake.
I thought I might make him green eggs and ham,
But all i had in the kitchen was butter and jam.

I thought I might buy him a fox in sox,
But there was no money in my pockets, only marbles and rocks.
So I considered buying him a fish or two,
But I could not decide if he would prefer a red fish or blue.

So for this day, I am unprepared
But since Dr. Seuss has passed, he is likely unaware
That I forgot about his birthday until it was to late
To cook him a ham, or bake him a cake.

And I was right about this post being short.
Tomorrow's will be longer, with less rhyming, of course.
But until then, please have a happy Thursday.
And to whom it may concern,
Have a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!




I did not bake a cake to celebrate this occasion; however, Jenn at Cakes by Jen did! And she did a much better job than I ever could have done!



Here is Dr. Seuss' biography

Here is a list of his books